Exile and hope
During the years of exile, (I saw that) Western women now enjoy equality that feminists once upon a time fought for but in South Asia, we still fight for women’s basic human rights. Then and now, my dream keeps me going. I dream of a beautiful world where no one will be oppressed. I dream of a progressive, healthy society. A world where all the people would live peacefully, and equality and justice between men and women will exist. I do not think that I will see such a society in my lifetime.But I live with the hope.
A rebel is born
I have since childhood questioned diktat, advice and proscriptions from the family and from society at large. When I, unlike my brothers, wasn’t allowed to play outside; when I was called ‘impure’ during my menstruation periods; or when I was told by some of my relatives and neighbours that I had grown up and must cover myself completely in a burqa if I wanted to step out, I questioned, I didn’t give in readily, I did not follow their orders.When strange boys would hurl abuses at me, snatch my scarf or pinch my breasts as I walked by, I protested. I couldn’t stomach it when I saw husbands beating their wives, young mothers weeping in anxiety and fear having given birth to a baby girl. Upon observing the shame on the faces of raped women, I felt their pain acutely; I broke down when I heard about women and children being trafficked from city to city, from one country to another in order to be forced into prostitution. Nothing could make me accept the torture of women by the men, the society, the state. But no one witnessed my pain, my tears, the non-acquiescence, the non-acceptance, the speechlessness, the inability to tolerate, the screams, the logic and reason – that is, until I started writing.
Unanswered questions
The society that I grew up in engendered questions in the minds of many. They were forced to accept the answers given by the leaders of the patriarchy. I didn’t accept their answers. No one taught me to be disobedient. I didn’t learn defiance from a book. It is not necessary to read thick and heavy books to be aware; one just needs eyes to observe. No one helps build courage either. In order to demand rights for women, one doesn’t need to internalize Simone de Beauvoir or Gloria Steinem, one’s own awareness is often good enough. If I’m hungry, I shall eat; if I am lashed, I shall wrest away the lash; if I am oppressed, I shall stand up – these sentiments are universal. Feminism is not a property of the West. It is the arduous struggle by abused, oppressed, tortured, disrespected, ignored women coming together, putting their lives at stake, for the sake of their rights.
Life lessons
My father was a secular humanist and my mother was a very kindhearted person. After reading the books of great writers, I have found I am actually more influenced by my father and mother. There are many favourite writers, though. The more I read, the more I evolve. The authors, who were my favourite ten years ago, are no more my favourite. I discover new authors.Sometimes I feel that good-readers should live at least for 50,000 years to read all the books they love.
The biggest misconception about Taslima Nasrin
By supporting women’s rights everywhere, I have criticized all misogynistic religions, traditions, cultures, and customs. But, to my surprise, I am labeled as being anti-Islam. This has led to some people saying that I am a Muslim-hater. But they are wrong! By no means am I a Muslim-hater! I always stand beside oppressed people. I stood beside Muslims when they were oppressed in Gujarat in India, in Palestine, and in Bosnia. I defended their rights to live, just as I stood beside the Hindus who are oppressed in Bangladesh and the Christians in Pakistan. To me, their religious identity is not important. I consider them as human beings. Nobody should be oppressed because of her or his belief. The criticism I make of the religions, I do by writing. I do not go to harm the believers physically. I do not believe in violence. The fanatics never accept the idea to have a dialogue or debate with me, or write articles or books opposing me, they come to kill me, for they are convinced by their belief in their religion that an apostate must be killed.
Mixed experiences in India
The sad thing is : West Bengal government banned my book because 25 intellectuals asked the government to ban the book. It was banned on the charges of hurting religious feelings of people. In a civilized country, writers defend writers’ freedom of expression and oppose banning and censorship. The good thing is: A human rights organisation filed a case against the banning of my book and after two years, Kolkata high court lifted the ban on the book.
Where the courageous writing flows from
In India, Women have been victims of female foeticide, infanticide, dowry murder, bride burning, gang-rape, slave trade, sexual slavery, domestic violence etc and I am trying my best to fight all kinds of discrimination against women by raising awareness.
I struggled for years to live as an independent human being in patriarchal society. I did not care what people said to me. I lived alone almost all my adult life and enjoyed my freedom. It was not easy though. Economic freedom, self-esteem, and the ability to reject patriarchal misogynistic system — are the keys for women to live with dignity.
with The New Indian Express Reema Moudgil works for The New Indian Express, Bangalore, is the author of Perfect Eight, the editor of Chicken Soup for the Soul-Indian Women, an artist, a former RJ and a mother. She dreams of a cottage of her own that opens to a garden and where she can write more books, paint, listen to music and just be.