Say Yo To Sexism

Recently a young colleague wrote a Facebook post about being stared at for the way she dresses or even otherwise. The point of the post was that a woman’s body is her business. It is not an offering or a piece of public property. The post went viral and was shared by various websites and though there were rational responses from both men and women, there was a deluge of extreme negativity ranging from rape threats to death threats to abuse. She was basically told in not so many words that if she was not a responsible dresser, men were not to be held responsible for what happened to her.

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Just around this time, Yo Yo Honey Singh, the voice running on a loop in a million young minds showed up on Comedy Nights with Kapil. Yes, the same singing sensation who pens ditties about short skirts, blue eyes, compares women to bombshells and a buffet. Well, he came, he sang and was deluged with applause, whistles and admiration even when he defended his suggestive lyrics by invoking of all people poet Shakeel Badayuni’s Aaj ki raat mere dil ki salami le le. “Ye kaun si salami hoti hai jo sirf raat mein di jaati hai?” he jeered. Well, no one told him that the song was alluding to the legend of shama and parwana ( a candle and a moth) and that candles are lit only in the dark. Not just that, parents of little boys encouraged them to dance with Mr Yo Yo on songs like `chaar bottle Vodka.’ The point is clear, isn’t it? Those who objectify women in their lyrics or on the streets are doing it because it is done. But a woman must be told how to behave and put in her place if she refuses to be objectified.

Not too long ago, Navjot Singh Siddhu good naturedly told a young woman on Kapil’s show, “ ye coat aise hi pehna hai?” Alluding that she dressed nice because she wanted male attention.and it was also said that if men didn’t notice her, she would bang her head against walls. The messages in the inbox of my young colleague basically said the same thing though in much uglier language.
The Internet has opened many channels for misogyny to run rampant and celebrate itself. So whether it is a 16 year old whose rape in the US is being mocked by people striking the same pose as the victim in pictures or journalist Rana Ayub who is being trashed on social media by trolls or my colleague, as long it is a woman who is being vilified, all seems right with the world. Because, if we did not all collectively agree that it is always the woman’s fault, who would be left to blame?

 with The New Indian Express  

Reema Moudgil works for The New Indian Express, Bangalore, is the author of Perfect Eight, the editor of  Chicken Soup for the Soul-Indian Women, an artist, a former RJ and a mother. She dreams of a cottage of her own that opens to a garden and  where she can write more books, paint, listen to music and  just be silent with her cats.