What is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare?

WH Davies

A friend of mine asked me once whether I had noticed the new park adjacent to my office. I replied in the negative. She snapped back, “But it has been there for a month now. You must be blind to miss it.” The next day I remembered to watch out for it. It confirmed one thing. I was blind.

Ever since then I make it a point to be more aware of my surroundings. I give myself these 15 minutes of my commute to see what I have missed all these years. Yes, I know that Mumbai has a Gateway Of India, Juhu Beach, Flora Fountain, we all have a broad perspective…but life lies in the details, the smaller things, the little pleasures.

Some years back I lived in a building for over two years. Yet I didn’t know who my neighbours were. Until one day a severe abdominal pain took me to their doorstep. And till today I regret the two years of not knowing them. With a heart full of warmth and generosity, they welcomed me into their lives, extending their joys to me and sharing my troubles. Each kind gesture of theirs rubbed in a question,”Why was my knocking on their door a result of pain, a need based act?”

Why didn’t I call on them in happier times and said, “Hi, I am on top of the world today and wanted to share my happiness with you?” Why do we search for people to share our pains but want to keep our joys to ourselves? Talking to some friends about this, I realized that it is nothing but our insecurities which turn us into closed, selfish islands. We are scared of losing whatever little we have if we share it, not realising that giving only doubles the joy, enhances it.

I used to pass by several people without noticing them. Now every morning I see my neighbour’s house-help, sitting in the basement, sipping chai. Smiling at me, a stranger, comes easily to her.

As I walk past my compound, I notice the gardener plucking out weeds, nurturing the flowers. He must be doing the same job for several years but the dedication to his plants never wanes. Why is it that we always crib about our jobs, find ourselves stuck in a rut?

I see the flowers which greet me every morning, bright specks in a million hues, spreading their glory and I apologise to them for ignoring them earlier. I smile back at the receptionist who smiles tirelessly at each person who enters the office. Even when some don’t respond, it doesn’t put her off.

Today, I may wake up with a million worries but these 15 minutes of my journey, of exploration, of seeing the pretty things on my way give a great start to my day. By the time I step into a full day of work, life seems more beautiful, more positive. And what surprises me is that people in more difficult circumstances than all of us teach me this positivity with the ability to smile in the face of adversity.

The less privileged know how to find one little moment of joy in their otherwise difficult lives and we who have it easier are always on the lookout for problems, flaws and faults, reasons to crib. We always talk about our problems, what is wrong with the system, who we had a fight with, who is bad.

Do we ever speak about the wonderful things we have, a nice person we met, a good deed someone did for us? Our newspapers tell us what is wrong with our country, who was murdered, who stole what. The crimes get our attention, the scams and scandals become the talk of the town. Negativity and looking at the darker side of things has become a way of life for us. We are used to sad, depressed faces around us. A happy person gets noticed and envied while a sad one is a normal sight. Shouldn’t it be the other way round with happiness being a regular affair and sadness an occasional passing cloud?

I realized this after 27 years of my life. You could start today. For the paint on our walls might be peeling but we have a home, we may not be able to flaunt diamonds but we have clothes to wear. We may struggle with problems but we have a hot meal every day. Life lies in the good, the beautiful, the positive. Pain should make one more appreciative of the little joys of life instead of dominating our existence.

That’s why today when I wake up in the mornings, I hear the birds chirping, not the traffic sounds, smell the coffee, not the garbage and when I see a smile on a face, I say to myself, “I don’t need to worry, all’s right with the world!”

Shabia Ravi Walia has been a media professional for the past 15 years, dabbling in production, creative direction and writing. However her biggest achievement, she says is the birth of her baby Sia and penning down the experiences associated with it in her book ‘Mamma Mania’ (http://www.flipkart.com/books/8184430383).

More about her on http://mammamania.in